Crosses everywhere

Electioned out?? A lot of people made huge efforts to make sure we could reach this day. I just hope any saffers who had the opportunity to vote did not squander the opportunity.

I voted (only once alas) on Wednesday. I didn't notice that my ID wasn't stamped till I actually looked!

Considering this. They didn't stamp my ID book. If the infernal ink had come off my finger (my fingernail was sparklingly clear 10 minutes after voting) I would have tried again at another station - and they would have been none the wiser. Did anyone consider that?? Did anyone do that??

I have a few suggestions for the IEC - but my biggest would be that they should have the procedures and rules on posters in the voting stations.

Talking about rules, I was also a little perturbed by the PARTY table so close to the voting station. And no, they weren't stocking voters up with streamers, those tooty things or asking us to blow out random number of candles whilst making wishes (although in retrospect that seems like a darn good idea now). This was a political party pitching up a table to "assist voters with queries" about 5 metres from the door of the voting station?!?!

The SAPS didn't seem to know if a POLITICAL PARTY could do that: "It's up to the presiding officer" I was told. Hmmm not that kosher me thinks. There were very clear rules for '94, but I don't know if they changed. So, I got no further than my query to the cops..

Anyway - I made my mark - the Anti Nuptial Contracts have done it again - and good for them. A reporter for the Washington Post called into 702 on Thursday to comment that new nations often go through water-shed transitions (some for the better some for the worse) in the 18 - 23 yr post Independence elections. That means next elections will be even more important than this one - assuming our Constitution is still in tact. I'm 95% confident it will be... lets hope the other 5% of my gut concern is completely wrong. There are some very good arguments as to why they won't play with the constitution - my cynical side says you can't keep a gravy train running with out all the foreign investment 'fuels'.

OK - so that's election's covered. I didn't mean to be so negative, but I think we (or any other for that matter) will always be a nation at risk when one party holds the constitutional majority.

Moving on... As those of you following Rambler will know, he recently added that sleek black and beautiful HD ready, LCD TV to the lounge. However, CV loves to watch telly in bed. Until the other day that was restricted to DVD's, 'cause the TV reception was appalling.

In our mountain-bike-shopping-expedition-gone-awry the fitness freak (me apparently) became softened by the lure of new gadgets (not entirely untrue). In the ensuing technology daze, I was determined to up the ante and add a remote blaster into the mix to remedy the TV-in-the-bedroom situation. These wireless blaster thingies cost a pretty penny and offer the world.

Now, I don't consider myself unskilled in the realm of connecting signal cables, I was a DJ after all and have connected so many sound systems, it's pretty much childs play. But after at least half an hour, I sat dazed, confused and somewhat frustrated before boldly declaring this confounded instrument did not have the correct cabling to split the signal to send it out to the bedroom. Removing this huge NO WAY JOSE cross to sending the DSTV signal to the bedroom was now a mission incomplete and had me stewing.

CV said I should take it back to the store and ask them to show ME how to connect the cables. As you can imagine; in my context; that was like a lass asking her beau to stop and ask for directions! BTW - this is not meant to imply gender specific roles between us, it's merely an illustrative example. Incidentally I have no problem asking for directions - but GPS makes that generally unnecessary.

I digress! I partially took that advice. I went go back to the store, having decided I needed 1-to-2 RCA cables. And after much discussion with the shop assistant, who unswayed by my assertions was trying to sell me a signal modulator. In the end, I vigorously demonstrated my genius plan to the guy. He conceded and thanked me for showing him something new, even though he'd lost a sale of R400-00 for a meagre R60-00 solution. I was smiling though.

Triumphant, I returned home and installed the solution, much to CV;s delight I might add! ;0) I did pick up a signal from our neighbours device, but managed to solve that by changing the remote signal pots.

Now, there's crossed signals eliminated and crosses made at the polling booth and we're all the better off for it it seems. YAY! Happy Friday everyone! Series channel forever!

Bits and bobs that are on my mind...

This month is so mottled with religious, political and other public holidays - I can barely keep up with all the supposed time off. It's worse than Christmas really, a whole month of not being able really settle down into anything, I simply end up being rather uninspired (to write).

But it's been more than a week since my last post - and that's almost enough to qualify as 'bailing out'. I'm still feeling uninspired, at this point, so I'm going to try one of those Stephen King manoeuvres that Rambler was talking about not too long ago.

Today, I just start writing and see what comes out on the other side.

Yesterday, I updated my Facebook status via Twitter, expressing frustration at not being able to hold an internet connection long enough to blog. I got a few comments on that, which was nice. The gawds honest truth though, is every time I sign in, my Internet Explorer suddenly goes 'offline'. This only happens at work though. If, I've got the time to write at home - then my GSM modem serves me incredibly well. I don't quite know why it is like that, but it's terribly frustrating. None the less, we continue forth (or fifth if you find fourth's not working too well). *you may now groan as your corn-o-meter red lines - LOL*.

I digress! Or do I? I still haven't found anything to write about. I don't want to bore myself and any other readers with matters pertaining to fitness and diet - although, this is something I do dedicate a fair amount of time too now.

On that note though, I've been wondering what I should do with my new fitness levels. I mean - I train hard every day, build up a massive sweat and for what? It's great being healthy and all, and I do so enjoy spending that hour or so a day in the Gym environment, snapping muscle fibres as I push, pull and fling various weights around. OK, so fling is an overstatement, but you get the drift.

In a way, the gym is my quiet time. It's the place where I end up unwinding from the stresses or frustrations of the day before heading home. Some how, I think I've mentioned this before, so I shall move one swiftly from here back to my point.

Now that my resting pulse is nice and low, and I have a very hard time keeping it up (my pulse that is) whilst working out, I know I'm now at a fitness level bordering on very very good, but not quite Lance Armstrong good. I've thought about running, but only for an instant as a simple entry point to competitive sports. I've considered joining the local football team as an alternative option. But my knees are not in the best shape, and somewhat prone to getting very sore very quickly. So I'm excluded from any impact sports. Which pretty much leaves skiing, swimming and cycling.

I've been (very very loosely, mind you) considering mountain biking. But this is something I need to discuss in greater depth with my special man before I go on in this forum.

Talking about my special man. We're planning for our honeymoon and wedding. I think I like the ideas Pierre had and will strongly consider doing that before we get married. Anyway, we're looking for somewhere exotic, exciting and idyllic. On a personal level, I'd also like another bash at getting a real sun tan. If anyone out there has a suggestion or three - swing them by me. Unlike my man CV, I've not traveled much: Germany, Holland, Botswana & Namibia make up the full list, but all of those visits were in the 80's, when I was too young to appreciate (take advantage of) the nightlife and such.

Shame, he's also been sick. Well, let me paraphrase that. he was sick. I gave him some TLC on Wednesday evening, 'cause he really needed it. Dinner was served in bed and we even ate chocolate. But I can't lie. I'm usually more inclined to let sick little puppies get the rest they need, undisturbed, because whe I'm a sick little puppy, I can be a hectically vicious terrier!

The good new is, yesterday he was his vibrant mischievous self. And I was beaming from ear to ear, probably a little more internally than externally, but beaming none the less. It's good to have him back from the depths of his near invisible misery.

OK - so this still qualifies as a post about nothing really. And I say - HEY! What the hell. This is kind of a public journal - and we all know what happens if journals don't get written... The memories simply fade away like sign writing without UV protection, slowly disappearing until they become nothing more than indistinct translucent hues on the enormous white backboard of our lives.

Yes, it is now written on my big whiteboard in the sky. One day I shall be able to look back and remember that I'm not a fan of April in South Africa - with it's multitude of holidays and the first whisperings of winter breathing down my neck in the early mornings. And I shall also look back and see if I ever did start mountain biking and remember the embryo of our honeymoon and wedding plans and look back fondly at the memory of going on away before (or after) the wedding...

Ciao 4 Now

Chronicles of Bana(na) - the pain, the watch and the wardrobe

So it's been a little while since I last posted. Mostly, cause I've been very busy, being busy and also, my internet connection at the office seems to hate me blogging, which is a whole other blog about conspiracy theories on it's own.

SO, without further adue, lets begin with a little translation - Bana is the isiPedi (Northern Sotho) word for Man. And being one (a man and not a isiPedi word that is), I thought I'd play off that a little to craft my Chronicles of Narnia word twist. Hehe. I've actually had today's title in mind for most of the week since my last post, but I didn't have a story to fill in all the bits, so I waited.... And I've been waiting until today. And now; I can revel in my true genius!!! *laughing manically to self, whilst passers by consider committing me for psychiatric*

The Pain

This morning, I feel like I'm suffering from sunburn. What on earth am I doing with sunburn in April any wise person would ask. The truth of the mater is it isn't sunburn at all. Nope, no sunburn for me, not now. Instead the discomfort I'm dealing with today is from a long contemplated, but not previously acted upon piece of 'cosmetic enhancement'.

I'm a hairy lad. The fact that I was bald by 27 is a hint at that. I've previously trimmed my stomach and chest hair back with a barbers 'buzzer' and have been waxing my awfully hairy back just under a year. Why would I do this? Well for starters, my dad's domestic, amongst others, used to called me Max (the Gorilla), for the latter part of my high school years. And then not too long ago a female friend asked me, not so politely, why I hadn't taken my shirt off, moments after I'd dived into a pool (sans shirt of course)!

I digress... The point is, all this body hair has bothered me a little. As a homosexual, I believe I should not have that much body hair, even if I'm what they would call butch! And now, especially with my recently found 'gym body', it was covering up all the definition I've worked so hard for.

So, after much contemplation, I decided to book myself for a chest wax, to match my back wax. Yesterday was the day of the Big Wax. That's even the way I noted it in my diary - the BIG WAX. With much trepidation, I entered the 'spa' took my shirt off and submitted myself to the mercy, or lack thereof, of the beautician. I won't lie, there were times my eyes watered and I whimpered - which is not the same as crying, but it comes pretty close.

How bad was it? Let's put this into perspective, we're talking about roughly 880 square cm of dense body hair being yanked off in the space of a few minutes! Last nights shower was decidedly COLD for my tastes, but that was the only way to stay comfortable. As a precaution, my chest and stomach are very well oiled today, and I have a sachet of moisturising lotion in my pocket for it's cooling powers once the oils have worn off. I just hope the uncomfortable tingling and red spots of the inflamed follicles subsides in the next 24hrs. I got through it - and after seeing the results - I've already booked for next month! I think CV's also impressed, which helps! :0)

Ladies, with your 'Brazilians' - I know your pain, and now I suspect, much more.


The Watch


It was my birthday recently, and mah man CV bought me (amongst other things) a new watch. This is no ordinary watch though - it's a POLAR F11. The POLAR range of watches is designed for future or present fitness guru's. For the unfit, I suspect this watch could be likened to the 'Hitleresque' gym class teacher you hated so much at school.

When starting the thing up to the first time, you basically measure your fitness, choose what kind of fitness level you whish to achieve and follow the workouts it plans for you.

My first week was a bit of a disaster as I learnt how to use the watch and tried to figure out which of my current workouts would slot relatively comfortably into the watches pre-set requirements. In spite of that, and much to CV`s dismay I was awarded a trophy for my efforts.

I kid you not though, if you're working out to the watches rhythm, this thing pushes you - HARD! I swam yesterday (which was the only workout I could do after the big Wax). My workout was only supposed to be 35 minutes, but it took me 8 minutes and 20 laps just to get up to my required heart rate to start. By the end of it, 48 minutes in total, I'd done 92 laps (2,3 Km's or 1,43 miles)! I guess that's make me a shoe in for a decent finish the Midmar next year. So me thinks I'll be entering.

Thank you polar (and CV of course) - for making me even more, more aware of fitness levels, but now with purpose - LOL.

The Wardrobe

People wishing to avoid sexy male models (read homoerotic imagery) should not read further, we venture 'below the belt' here...

My birthday is often marked by the odd treat for myself. Last year was music and DVD's - how utterly predictable. This year, in a revelation of my not oft gay self - I spent it on underwear. This is not the kind of underwear middle aged wives buy their husbands from the local Woolies. It's not even from the established brand Jockey or even the more upmarket Calvin Klein. Nope, this year I spoilt myself to uber low cut briefs and boxers - imported from distant places, manufactured for men who who wish to feel very very sexy.

I bought two brands of undies from an (almost certainly gay) underwear shop called FMO, For Men Only. Branded Ginch Gonch and XTG... my latest additions to the wardrobe are feeling like the best buys I've made in a while! Look at them, they're absolutely deeeelicious and they make me feel the same!

And whilst you're drooling over those, I bid you a fond...
Ciao4Now!

A pinch and a punch for the first of the month...

It's a silly saying, but it's one that rings especially true on April the 1st, 'cause if you're not paying attention, a news item might make you want to pinch yourself to make sure what you heard is 'true' and then punch (or kick, whichever is most convenient) yourself when you realise it's all a load of baloney!

Being a 702 listener (Cape Talk, K-fm and Highveld are sister stations), I consume a fair amount of news but I wasn't thinking about it being the 1st of April...

Initially I was caught (only for a moment, mind you) by the Eyewitness News report that Benoni's other star (Rambler's is of course it's foremost), the Oscar winner Charlize Theron, is ditching Hollywood to join the cast of Isidingo!

I've trawled a few other news sites to see what they're up to today and these are my picks:

SABC News: Gautrain construction on hold after discovery of gold coins
E-TV News Channel: doesn't seem to have a website which is a joke in itself...
BBC International: Rio moves to wall off its slums
SKY News: America Builds World's Most Powerful Laser or Professor's Apocalyptic Vision Of America both seem totally outlandish..
CNN was not glaringly obvious: could it be this one; Soccer robots being built to beat humans?

I'm not entirely sure that all my picks are actually April Fools reports, I could be wrong. The only way to check is to come back to these tomorrow I guess.

I know of some truly awful 'in family' April Fools that have been pulled. Stuff that caused grief and family feuds! Perhaps they're less sensitive about the pranks they pull because they're not likely to have to potential to cause a global meltdown - and of course they have slightly sadistic tendancies. Thankfully my family does not have a habit of playing silly Aprils Fools jokes on one another. Hehehe

What caught you today and what didn't?

Ciao4Now